I’m getting married next year and of course I’ll be expected to make a speech. Was hoping you guys could come up with some cracking one liners I could use and make my speech funny, plus every loves a good joke!
The only one I like so far is this:
“I didn’t really know where to start with this speech, so I thought I’d trawl the internet. After a couple of hours I‘d found some really, really good stuff. But then I remembered that I was supposed to be writing a speech.”
Speeches are much more fun when they are about the people involved in the event. There is always a lighthearted take on any situation–including a relationship. E.g. What it was like for you meeting your future inlaws for the first time … etc. I was once asked to be best man, and gave a speech listing the ten worst faults about the groom. In fact, they were all backhanded compliments*, but just presenting it that way was a lot of fun.
[*EDIT just looked up the term “backhanded compliment” and apparently it means the opposite of what I thought. So what I meant to say way that I pretended to be listing faults, but they were actually virtues in reality.]
How about starting with , " I always hoped I’d be single forever " … then you could say something sweet like " but once I met ____, I knew I couldn’t imagine my life without her"
it would have the main components of a good speech #1: you’ve captured the audience’s attention; #2: you’ve incorporated shock value.