Cute Sayings

If you love somebody, set them free. If they return, they were always yours. If they don’t, they never were.

Friendship often ends in love; but love in friendship - never.

The courage to imagine the otherwise is our greatest resource.

Many a genius is never honored until the future proves his inspiration.

Don’t worry about the world coming to an end today. It is already tomorrow in Australia.

You haven’t lost your smile at all, it’s right under your nose. You just forgot it was there.

If love is a language of the heart, my heart speaks volumes.

Come live in my heart, and pay no rent.

Happiness is nothing more than good health and a bad memory.

It’s easy to fall in love. The hard part is finding someone to catch you.

A family is a place where principles are hammered and honed on the anvil of everyday living.

Dont worry about knowing people, make yourself worth knowing.

In your sleep It’s got you so deep, My sweet melody Has captured you Forevermore…

you can fall from the sky… you can fall from a tree… but the best way to fal…l is in luv with me!

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Nobody could actually say that you deserve better because the best thing that you deserve will always be your choice.:wink:

Before criticising someone, walk a mile in their shoes. That way when you criticise them you’ll be a mile away and have their shoes.

To be frank, I have a 400 pages book about quotes. My favorite is: Do all the good you can, by all the means you can, in all the ways you can, in all the places you can, at all the times you can, to all the people you can, as long as ever you can. Given by John Weskley. I always think help others is help ourselves at last. So I just treat this quote as my motto.

see it before judge …definitely true if sombodys love.

Funny sayings…kinda

  1. At lunchtime, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hairdryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.

  2. Page yourself over the intercom. Don’t disguise your voice.

  3. Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.

  4. Put your garbage can on your desk and label it “IN.”

  5. Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has gotten over his or her caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.

  6. In the memo field of all your checks, write " FOR SEXUAL FAVORS".

  7. Finish all your sentences with “In accordance with the prophecy.”

  8. Don’t use any punctuation

  9. As often as possible, skip rather than walk.

  10. Ask people what sex they are. Laugh hysterically after they answer.

  11. Specify that your drive-through order is “to go.”

  12. Sing along at the opera.

  13. Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don’t rhyme.

  14. Put mosquito netting around your work area. Play a tape of jungle sounds all day.

  15. Five days in advance, tell your friends you can’t attend their party because you’re not in the mood.

  16. Have your co workers address you by your wrestling name, Rock Hard.

  17. When the money comes out of the ATM, scream “I Won!” “I Won!” “This is the 3rd time this week!!!”

  18. When leaving the zoo, start running towards the parking lot yelling, “Run for your lives, they’re loose!”

  19. Tell your children over dinner. “Due to the economy, we are going to have to let one of you go.”

Funny sayings…kinda 2


If you cut off a glowworm’s tail would it be delighted?

How do you know which armrest is yours in the movie theaters?

If you say something is indescribable, isn’t that describing it?

Do Dutch people always split the bill?

Can you sleep forever without being in coma?

Why is it called butterfingers when there is no butter or fingers in it?

If you shine a light into a mirror, do you get twice as much light?

How come it was called the Cosby Show when Billy Cosby’s character was named Heathcliff Huxtible?

If a Truck is loaded with Helium, would it weigh less than when it was empty? Wouldn’t it get better fuel mileage?

Why is the blackboard green?

Why do they call it a black light when it’s really purple?

Why do hotdogs come in packs of 8 when hotdog rolls come in packs of 10?

What do you call male ballerinas?

How come the sun makes your skin darker but your hair lighter?

If you dig a tunnel straight through the earth, will you come out with your feet first?

Why are pennies bigger than dimes?

Did they have antiques in the olden days?

Are zebras black with white stripes, or white with black stripes?

If Pringles are “so good that once you pop, you can’t stop” why do they come with a resealable lid?

Arbitrator - \ar’-bi-tray-ter\:
A cook that leaves Arby’s to work at McDonald’s.

Avoidable - \uh-voy’-duh-buhl\:
What a bullfighter tries to do.

Baloney - \buh-lo’-nee\:
Where some hemlines fall.

Bernadette - \burn’-a-det\:
The act of torching a mortgage.

Burglarize - \bur’-gler-ize\:
What a crook sees with.

Control - \kon-trol’\:
A short, ugly inmate.

Counterfeiters - \kown-ter-fit-ers\:
Workers who put together kitchen cabinets.

Eclipse - \i-klips’\:
what an English barber does for a living.

Eyedropper - \i’-drop-ur\:
a clumsy ophthalmologist.

Heroes - \hee’-rhos\:
what a guy in a boat does.

Left Bank - \left’ bangk’\:
what the robber did when his bag was full of loot.

Misty - \mis’-tee\:
How some golfers create divots.

Paradox - \par’-uh-doks\:
two physicians.

Parasites - \par’-uh-sites\:
what you see from the top of the Eiffel Tower.

Pharmacist - \farm’-uh-sist\:
a helper on the farm.

Polarize - \po’-lur-ize\:
what penguins see with.

Primate - \pri’-mat\: removing your spouse from in front of the TV.

Relief - \ree-leef’\:
what trees do in the spring.

Rubberneck - \rub’-er-nek\:
what you do to relax your wife.

Seamstress - \seem’-stres\:
describes 250 pounds in a size six.

Selfish - \sel’-fish\:
what the owner of a seafood store does.

Subdued - \sub-dood’\:
like, a guy, like, works on one of those, like, submarines, man.

Sudafed - \sood’-a-fed\:
bringing litigation against a government.

“Reading maketh a full man; conference a ready man; and writing an exact man.” – Francis Bacon

“'Twas brillig and the slithy toves did gyre and gimble in the wabe…” – Lewis Carroll