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  1. #1
    Destiny Manager Plebius's Avatar
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    I'm just curious what everybody thinks about it. Personally I think it's the wrong place to look.


  2. #2
    SitePoint Wizard TWTCommish's Avatar
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    I don't think there is necessarily a wrong place...my mother recently married my new step-father...she met him through some online Christian classifieds.

    I do think, however, that people should not go around flirting online for the helluvit...I personally would not look online for a romantic interest, but I don't have a problem with those who do, as long as they watch themselves and know what they're doing I suppose.

  3. #3
    Destiny Manager Plebius's Avatar
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    I didn't say people shouldn't do it, because it obviously works for some people. But most the time I think you're probably just going to find some psycho. I prefer 'real life' people anyway.

  4. #4
    SitePoint Wizard TWTCommish's Avatar
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    Oh yeah, I agree with that. The odds of it being anywhere near worth your time are slim to none, and slim is heading home.

    I think the odds of running into a pyscho are quite small though.

  5. #5
    Your Lord and Master, Foamy gold trophy Hierophant's Avatar
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    I meant my first wife online, before there was an Internet as we know it today. She was ok at first but went psycho 7 years later, hence her being my ex.

    I met my fiance 3 years ago online in an online game but we got to know each other as friends long before we started dating. This is a much more stable relationship.
    Wayne Luke
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  6. #6
    Serial Publisher silver trophy aspen's Avatar
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    I made an online personal a year and a half ago or so. I figured I meet girls at class and at parties, but you never know and it couldn't hurt, plus I thought online personals were for losers but then I say some pretty hot girls with one, so I made it.

    I met alot of freaks from it, I mean alot, one girl threatened to kill me. But eventually I met Marie, my current girlfriend. We get along great and will probably get married some day.

    For 4th of july weekend me and her went to one of her friends houses. Her friend met a guy online and they were married now, and her friends friend also met her current husband online. I was amazed at how prevalent meeting people online had become. And I dont think there is anything wrong with it.

    Of course seriously meeting people online is not going into some cyber sex chatroom or something like that, but as more and more people use the internet more and more people meet online, afterall the best use of the internet is communicating with people far away.

    If you are going to do so though, you still need to be careful, when I had my personal up I always told the girls I met online that I had to meet them in real life asap otherwise how would I know if they told the truth about themselves? As it was I still lived in the dorms then of one of the biggest universities in the country, so most of the ones I met were close by, some ever across the street or 1 floor up actually. Some however I went to meet, and alot of them were psycho, I wasn't scared since I am 6'5 and 230lbs but you never know. I eventually just told new girls I met online that I wouldn't go meet them, they would have to come meet me, I was just sick of going to meet psychotic people.

    Chris

  7. #7
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    Great topic, LuZer ! A topic I can certainly relate to.

    Well, I too have had the experience of putting up some personal ads online. But most of the time, I prefer to answer to women's personal ads. I guess I have been fortunate thus far because I tend to select women who are nearby. That way, it is easier to meet them for dinner, movies and so on. Even though I have not yet gone steady with any of them, I still consider the internet a good source for friends. I mean ..... I go to bars and meet women there too. The internet is just an additional tool to make new friends. Most, if not all, of the women I've met through personals, chatrooms, ICQ and so on ..... are still friends with me today. So, the approach is fine as long as you get yourself in there with caution. Do not expect the world, do not expect to meet a Super Model or anything like that ..... just approach it with an open mind and have fun making new friends.

  8. #8
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    right, i think you real life is better for looking for a partner. you never know which guy is chatting with you,

    rgds,
    markus
    http://www.webtipz.com


  9. #9
    Misfit
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    I've never met anyone online who I've gone to meet in real life, let alone start dating them or whatever. I much more like real life love...

  10. #10
    SitePoint Wizard TWTCommish's Avatar
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    I once met a friend in real life from online...but that was because I was introduced to her from a real life friend and she lived nearby.

  11. #11
    SitePoint Zealot Lorina's Avatar
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    I don't think *any* place is the wrong place to look for friends or romance. What makes you think people online are any different from people offline? They're the same people whether they're in front of a monitor or not. There's freaks and weirdos online, sure, but the same freaks and weirdos are at your grocery store, your gas station, and in the cubicle next to you at work. People are people, and I personally would rather get to know someone slowly, safely, and sanely through the internet, than meet some guy in a dark, smokey bar, late at night, after I've been drinking, and give him my phone number!

    I met my fiance online -- he answered a personals ad I placed -- and we are absolutely perfect for each other. We've been dating almost a year. I've also encountered *more* than my share of weirdos online, but I was able to screen out the weirdos before meeting them face-to-face. It's not for everyone -- it works best if you know what you're looking for, aren't expecting an instant relationship, have the ability to express yourself in written form, and have the ability to send LOTS of e-mails!!!

    Now, let me clarify, I do *NOT* consider someone chatting on ICQ and e-mails, and not meeting in real life as dating. I'm talking about using the internet as a tool to meet and get to know someone, learn enough about them to trust them, THEN meeting them and seeing if there's any sparks. Proclaiming love for someone you've never seen, touched, or spoken to face to face is just begging for heartache and disappointment.

    I don't want to seem out of line here, and that I'm spamming here, since this is my first post here, but if you're truly interested in online meeting, I'd like to invite you to check out my website. It's NOT a dating service, it's a site about the trials and tribulations of meeting online with advice and anecdotes and humor. Again, if I'm out of line, I apologize. So, please, don't hurt me. I'm fragile! I've been reading this forums for months, and this was the thread to finally spur me into registering.
    Cheese-N-Rice - A daily comic strip.

  12. #12
    Sports Publisher mjames's Avatar
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    I think you should look where you need or want to. If the Internet is your solution, go for it. Whatever makes you happy.

  13. #13
    Destiny Manager Plebius's Avatar
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    I don't have anything against meeting people online that you're going to meet in person VERY soon, but if you're not then I don't really see the point. Words on a screen can be very misleading as to the persons personality, etc.


  14. #14
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    bad,
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  15. #15
    SitePoint Zealot Lorina's Avatar
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    IMHO, I'd recommend meeting within a month. Any more than that, and you're going to build up too many expectations about the other person, and they're going to build up too many expectations about you. Personally, what's worked best for me, is getting to know someone as a friend first and let the flirting and romantic undertones wait until you meet in person. And exchange lots of pictures - RECENT pictures.

    There's no guarantee that someone is going to be right for you, or even all they said they were, but there's no guarantee when you meet someone in real life, too.

    Cheese-N-Rice - A daily comic strip.


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