SitePoint Sponsor

User Tag List

Page 3 of 4 FirstFirst 1234 LastLast
Results 51 to 75 of 85

Thread: Dear Ah...

  1. #51
    SitePoint Wizard jimbo_dk's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2005
    Location
    Singapore
    Posts
    1,261
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)


    It gets lamer. 10 sheep are in the back of a truck, being driven to the slaughter. 3 sheep jump.

    How many are left?
    Winners Respond. Losers React.
    Singapore Web Designer

  2. #52
    I Love Licorice silver trophybronze trophy Datura's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Location
    Florida USA
    Posts
    5,774
    Mentioned
    1 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Quote Originally Posted by jimbo_dk View Post


    It gets lamer. 10 sheep are in the back of a truck, being driven to the slaughter. 3 sheep jump.

    How many are left?
    The joke is not funny, but looking at what you have said before and combining the two, that is funny :

    Quote Originally Posted by jimbo_dk View Post
    I never really grew up, but I still don't laugh at crap jokes
    Ulrike
    TUTs: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

  3. #53
    Keep Moving Forward gold trophysilver trophybronze trophy
    Shaun(OfTheDead)'s Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    Location
    Trinidad
    Posts
    3,746
    Mentioned
    45 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Quote Originally Posted by jimbo_dk
    It gets lamer. 10 sheep are in the back of a truck, being driven to the slaughter. 3 sheep jump.

    How many are left?
    10 sheep.

    No one said that they jumped out.




    Trying to fill the unforgiving minute
    with sixty seconds' worth of distance run.

    Update on Sitepoint's Migration to Discourse

  4. #54
    SitePoint Wizard jimbo_dk's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2005
    Location
    Singapore
    Posts
    1,261
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Quote Originally Posted by Shaun(OfTheDead) View Post
    10 sheep.No one said that they jumped out.
    Clever boy

    Quote Originally Posted by Datura View Post
    The joke is not funny, but looking at what you have said before and combining the two, that is funny :
    It is super-lame, but when my friend told me this in the train, half of the cabin started laughing.
    Winners Respond. Losers React.
    Singapore Web Designer

  5. #55
    I Love Licorice silver trophybronze trophy Datura's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Location
    Florida USA
    Posts
    5,774
    Mentioned
    1 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Jokes have a strange way of becoming funny when you are in a group of people in the mood to laugh. Add a beer or two, and the most stupid remark becomes a joke where people laugh with tears running down their cheeks.

    Moments like this are wonderful
    Ulrike
    TUTs: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

  6. #56
    SitePoint Wizard silver trophy Crazybanana's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2003
    Location
    In tha fruit cellar
    Posts
    1,379
    Mentioned
    32 Post(s)
    Tagged
    1 Thread(s)
    Quote Originally Posted by Datura View Post
    Jokes have a strange way of becoming funny when you are in a group of people in the mood to laugh. Add a beer or two, and the most stupid remark becomes a joke where people laugh with tears running down their cheeks.

    Moments like this are wonderful
    change the beer with booze and add a guitar or three and it gets amazing
    Who's to doom when the judge himself is dragged before the bar


  7. #57
    I Love Licorice silver trophybronze trophy Datura's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Location
    Florida USA
    Posts
    5,774
    Mentioned
    1 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Quote Originally Posted by Crazybanana View Post
    change the beer with booze and add a guitar or three and it gets amazing
    Yeah
    And add a big fire in the great outdoors, a little food on sticks roasting in that fire.
    Ulrike
    TUTs: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

  8. #58
    SitePoint Wizard jimbo_dk's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2005
    Location
    Singapore
    Posts
    1,261
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Yeah, that would be nice. Haven't done that in a really long time.
    Winners Respond. Losers React.
    Singapore Web Designer

  9. #59
    I Love Licorice silver trophybronze trophy Datura's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Location
    Florida USA
    Posts
    5,774
    Mentioned
    1 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Quote Originally Posted by jimbo_dk View Post
    Yeah, that would be nice. Haven't done that in a really long time.
    I have done this many times back in my old country, here a little bit on the beach until they clamped down on being on the beach with drink and fire (GRRRRRRR). It is such a deep thing in us humans to sit by the fire and being in a groupů
    Ulrike
    TUTs: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

  10. #60
    SitePoint Wizard jimbo_dk's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2005
    Location
    Singapore
    Posts
    1,261
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    ....and then lie on the beach and watch the shooting stars all night.
    Winners Respond. Losers React.
    Singapore Web Designer

  11. #61
    I Love Licorice silver trophybronze trophy Datura's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Location
    Florida USA
    Posts
    5,774
    Mentioned
    1 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    It is nice on the beach at night. The water sounds different, the air is like an envelope then.
    Ulrike
    TUTs: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

  12. #62
    HAHA!
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Posts
    656
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    for good measure let me tell the funniest joke in the world

    Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy takes out his phone and calls the emergency services.

    He gasps: "My friend is dead! What can I do?" The operator says: "Calm down, I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then a gunshot is heard. Back on the phone, the guy says: "OK, now what?"
    Cheap web hosting directory listing the cheapest web hosting

    Submit articles to an article directory

  13. #63
    I Love Licorice silver trophybronze trophy Datura's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Location
    Florida USA
    Posts
    5,774
    Mentioned
    1 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Yeah, old one. Always good though
    Ulrike
    TUTs: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

  14. #64
    SitePoint Wizard silver trophy Crazybanana's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2003
    Location
    In tha fruit cellar
    Posts
    1,379
    Mentioned
    32 Post(s)
    Tagged
    1 Thread(s)
    Quote Originally Posted by Hostpitable View Post
    Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy takes out his phone and calls the emergency services.

    He gasps: "My friend is dead! What can I do?" The operator says: "Calm down, I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then a gunshot is heard. Back on the phone, the guy says: "OK, now what?"
    Who's to doom when the judge himself is dragged before the bar


  15. #65
    HAHA!
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Posts
    656
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Ministry of Wildlife & Fisheries - Republic of South Africa

    WARNING
    Due to the rising frequency of human to lion encounters, the Ministry of Wildlife & Fisheries in the Republic of South Africa is advising all hikers, hunters, fisherman and tourists that use the out-of-doors in a recreational or work related function to take extra precautions while in the bush.

    We advise all outdoors men and women to wear noisy little bells on their clothing so as to give advanced warning to any lions that might be close by so that you don’t take them by surprise.
    We also advise anyone using the out-of-doors to carry “Pepper Spray” with them in case of an encounter with a lion.

    Outdoors men and women should also be on the watch for fresh lion activity, and be able to tell the difference between lion cub s*it and big lion sh*t. Lion cub *hit is smaller and contains lots of berries and dassie fur. Big lion shi* has bells in it and smells like pepper spray.
    onecharacter
    Last edited by Hostpitable; Nov 1, 2007 at 10:22.
    Cheap web hosting directory listing the cheapest web hosting

    Submit articles to an article directory

  16. #66
    I Love Licorice silver trophybronze trophy Datura's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Location
    Florida USA
    Posts
    5,774
    Mentioned
    1 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Ulrike
    TUTs: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

  17. #67
    Keep Moving Forward gold trophysilver trophybronze trophy
    Shaun(OfTheDead)'s Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    Location
    Trinidad
    Posts
    3,746
    Mentioned
    45 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    An Italian, an Irishman and a Chinese guy are hired at a construction site. The foreman points out a huge pile of sand.

    He says to the Italian guy, "You're in charge of sweeping."

    To the Irishman he says, "You're in charge of shoveling."

    And to the Chinese guy, "You're in charge of supplies."

    He then says, "Now, I have to leave for a little while. I expect you guys to make a dent in that there pile of sand."


    When the foreman returns, after being away for a couple of hours, the pile of sand is untouched.

    He asks the Italian, "Why didn't you sweep any of it?"

    The Italian replies, "I no hava no broom. You saida to the Chinese-a fella that he a wasa in a charge of supplies, but he hasa disappeared and I no coulda finda him nowhere."

    Then the foreman turns to the Irishman and says, And you, I thought I told you to shovel this pile."

    The Irishman replies, "Aye, that ye did laddie, boot ah couldnay get meself a shoovel! Ye left th' Chinese gadgie in chairge of supplies, boot ah couldnay fin' him neither."

    The foreman is really angry now. He storms off to look for the Chinese guy. Just then, the Chinese guy jumps out from behind the pile of sand and yells...

    "SUPPLIES!!"




    Trying to fill the unforgiving minute
    with sixty seconds' worth of distance run.

    Update on Sitepoint's Migration to Discourse

  18. #68
    I Love Licorice silver trophybronze trophy Datura's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Location
    Florida USA
    Posts
    5,774
    Mentioned
    1 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    You are good joke-teller Shaun
    Ulrike
    TUTs: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

  19. #69
    Keep Moving Forward gold trophysilver trophybronze trophy
    Shaun(OfTheDead)'s Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    Location
    Trinidad
    Posts
    3,746
    Mentioned
    45 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Nah, I just know good jokes.




    Trying to fill the unforgiving minute
    with sixty seconds' worth of distance run.

    Update on Sitepoint's Migration to Discourse

  20. #70
    Galactic Overlord gold trophysilver trophybronze trophy
    HAWK's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2003
    Location
    New Zealand
    Posts
    12,595
    Mentioned
    984 Post(s)
    Tagged
    14 Thread(s)
    This is my all time favourite.

    A man walks into his bedroom with a duck under his arm and says "This is the pig I'm sleeping with."
    His wife says "Honey, that's not a pig, it's a duck."
    The man says "I was talking to the duck."

  21. #71
    I Love Licorice silver trophybronze trophy Datura's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Location
    Florida USA
    Posts
    5,774
    Mentioned
    1 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Quote Originally Posted by HAWK View Post
    This is my all time favourite.

    A man walks into his bedroom with a duck under his arm and says "This is the pig I'm sleeping with."
    His wife says "Honey, that's not a pig, it's a duck."
    The man says "I was talking to the duck."
    Oh my
    Ulrike
    TUTs: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

  22. #72
    HAHA!
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Posts
    656
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Quote Originally Posted by HAWK View Post
    This is my all time favourite.

    A man walks into his bedroom with a duck under his arm and says "This is the pig I'm sleeping with."
    His wife says "Honey, that's not a pig, it's a duck."
    The man says "I was talking to the duck."
    Definately my new favourite joke!
    Cheap web hosting directory listing the cheapest web hosting

    Submit articles to an article directory

  23. #73
    SitePoint Wizard silver trophy Crazybanana's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2003
    Location
    In tha fruit cellar
    Posts
    1,379
    Mentioned
    32 Post(s)
    Tagged
    1 Thread(s)
    Quote Originally Posted by HAWK View Post
    This is my all time favourite.

    A man walks into his bedroom with a duck under his arm and says "This is the pig I'm sleeping with."
    His wife says "Honey, that's not a pig, it's a duck."
    The man says "I was talking to the duck."
    reminds me of.. never mind hehehe
    Who's to doom when the judge himself is dragged before the bar


  24. #74
    Keep Moving Forward gold trophysilver trophybronze trophy
    Shaun(OfTheDead)'s Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    Location
    Trinidad
    Posts
    3,746
    Mentioned
    45 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Come on guys it wasn't that funny...




    Trying to fill the unforgiving minute
    with sixty seconds' worth of distance run.

    Update on Sitepoint's Migration to Discourse

  25. #75
    I Love Licorice silver trophybronze trophy Datura's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Location
    Florida USA
    Posts
    5,774
    Mentioned
    1 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Now you are being funny
    Ulrike
    TUTs: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10


Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •