SitePoint Sponsor

User Tag List

Results 1 to 4 of 4

Thread: Arrrggghhh....

  1. #1
    We like music. weirdbeardmt's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2001
    Location
    Channel Islands Girth: Footlong
    Posts
    5,882
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Arrrggghhh....

    This is literally as it read (i.e. NO introduction):

    SOME INFORMATION ABOUT OUR COMPANY:

    Central Solutions only distributes legal credit repair information and
    financial business programs to thousands of individuals all over the United
    States. In doing so, we have developed a work-at-home program for
    individuals interested in the opportunity of earning an extra $500.00 to
    $1,500.00 per week working directly from the comforts of their own home,
    dorm or apartment. Our work-at-home program is an honest opportunity for you
    to earn a serious extra income without having to sacrifice a lot of your
    free time. All of the work that you will be doing is very simple and can be
    done from your desk or right at your kitchen table. As a home worker, you
    can work full or part time whenever you have the free time, mornings,
    afternoons or evenings. In addition, there is absolutely no experience
    necessary for you to participate in our program. Our work-at-home program is
    perfect for individuals interested in earning a serious extra income to help
    pay off of their bills! That's right! If you have car payments, rent,
    mortgage payments, credit card bills, loan payments, etc...this is an
    excellent opportunity for you to supplement your existing income and start
    putting some extra money in your pocket! If you are interested, the
    following information will help to further explain the very profitable
    work-at-home program that we have to offer you.

    PROGRAM DESCRIPTION:

    Our program simply involves the folding and processing of pamphlets. YOU
    WILL RECEIVE A FULL $1.00 FOR EACH AND EVERY PAMPHLET THAT YOU PROCESS! What
    do we mean by process? It's simple...

    FIRST: You will neatly fold the provided preprinted single-sided (8 1/2 by
    11 inch) pamphlets into thirds [The pamphlet that you will be processing
    will be provided to you and will be printed on regular 20 lb. (8-1/2 by 11)
    inch paper.

    SECOND: You will neatly insert the folded pamphlets into the pre-addressed,
    postage paid envelopes [These envelopes will be sent directly to your home,
    dorm or apartment with customers' names and addresses already printed on the
    envelopes along with postage already affixed to the envelopes].

    THIRD: Lick and seal these envelopes and then send them out, directly to the
    customers.

    It's that simple! You DO NOT have to pay any postage costs to send out these
    pamphlets. The pre-addressed, postage paid envelopes will be sent directly
    to your home, dorm or apartment. You simply fold the pamphlets, insert them
    in the envelopes and send them right out! Remember, all of the processing
    work can easily be done at your desk or right at your kitchen table!
    IMPORTANT: We do provide you with the actual pamphlet that you will be
    processing which is a sales pamphlet for our Credit Repair Manual. Our
    Credit Repair Manual is a best-selling financial product that many people
    are ordering and using to legally clear up their negative credit. And since
    the demand for our Credit Repair Manual is so OVERWHELMING, you will have
    the opportunity to process as many pamphlets as your schedule can handle!
    You can process 100...500...1,000 or even 1,500 pamphlets per week, week
    after week, month after month, year after year ... for as long as you wish
    to participate!

    HOW MUCH MONEY CAN YOU EARN?

    YOU WILL RECEIVE A FULL $1.00 FOR EACH AND EVERY PAMPHLET THAT YOU PROCESS!
    If you process 500 pamphlets you will receive a full $500.00..If you process
    1,000 pamphlets you will receive a full $1,000.00...if you process 1,500
    pamphlets you will receive a full $1,500.00...Etc! What's even better about
    our program is that you NEVER have to worry about the sale of our Credit
    Repair Manual in order to receive your $1.00 per pamphlet. Our program DOES
    NOT WORK ON COMMISSION! You will receive a FULL $1.00 for each and every
    pamphlet that you process REGARDLESS if any sales are made! Even if you
    process 1,500 pamphlets and no sales are made, you will still earn A FULL
    $1,500.00! It's simple, process 1,500 pamphlets, and receive A FULL
    $1,500.00 for your time and effort! Processing payments and additional
    processing materials will continue to arrive at your home, dorm or apartment
    for as long as you wish to continue participating in the program! That's
    right, you can always have money coming in week after week because
    processing payments and additional processing materials will continue to
    arrive at your home, dorm or apartment for as long as you wish to
    participate! Honestly, there is NO GUESSWORK. Our program has been around
    for several years and is very successful!

    FACT: Even working slowly, you could still earn a MUCH BETTER weekly income
    than most regular 9:00 AM to 5:00 PM jobs!

    THERE IS NO EXPERIENCE REQUIRED TO PARTICIPATE IN OUR PROGRAM:

    Anyone, young or old, male or female, anywhere in the United States can
    easily earn great money participating in our Pamphlet Processing Program!
    The reason why our program does not require any experience is simple...it
    does not take any previous experience to fold a pamphlet, insert it into an
    envelope, and seal an envelope. Plus, our program is especially beneficial
    for people who need to earn a serious extra income but might not have the
    spare time for a second job. As stated, just a few hours per day could
    possibly earn you well over $500.00 per week... NO JOKE! Just imagine how
    nice it would be if you could earn an extra $500.00 to $1,500.00 per week
    working from your home...no more annoying boss...no more hectic rush hour
    commuting...no more stressful 9 to 5 job...and no more headaches! FACT:
    Practically every type of person can benefit financially from our Pamphlet
    Processing Program. IMPORTANT: The information contained in our Credit
    Repair Manual is 100% Legal and Legitimate! In fact, there are hundreds of
    lawyers and attorneys all over the country using this valuable information
    and charging people big money to remove negative and incorrect items from
    their credit files! However, our Credit Repair Manual explains how people
    can do the VERY SAME THING that these costly attorneys are doing except our
    credit repair manual shows people how to repair their credit FAST, EASY and
    for FREE without having to hire an attorney! Now is the time, there are
    TENS-OF-MILLIONS of Americans with bad credit that would probably love to
    receive our Credit Repair Manual! Therefore, if you are serious about
    devoting a few hours per week towards the opportunity of earning an honest
    extra income, our $1.00 Pamphlet Processing Program is PERFECT FOR YOU!

    IF YOU WOULD LIKE TO PARTICIPATE:

    We will send you a Starter's Kit containing the instructions necessary for
    you to begin participating IMMEDIATELY in our Pamphlet Processing Program!
    Plus, your Starters Kit also contains your very own copy of Credit Repair
    Manual! That's right you can use our best-selling manual to legally clear up
    and repair any negative credit that you may have! This manual is included
    for becoming a member of our Pamphlet Processing Program! Therefore, to get
    started immediately, all that our company requires is a one-time refundable
    order-processing fee of only $45. Please understand, we cannot afford to
    send out a package of valuable materials to everyone interested in our
    program. And also keep in mind that once you process 100 pamphlets you will
    have already earned your $45 back and are left with an extra $55 profit!!!
    We must charge a small processing fee to ensure that only serious
    individuals intend to participate in our program. Keep in mind, you NEVER
    have to pay us any other fees and you can participate for as long as you
    wish! This fee simply assures our company that you are indeed serious about
    our program and the opportunity to make good money working from your home.
    Sorry, we CAN NOT process your order form without the one-time processing
    fee since there are far too many serious individuals willing to pay this
    small one-time fee in order to participate in our high profit work-at-home
    program. Therefore, all you have to do is just complete, print, sign, and
    send in the Order Form (FORM AHG-743: 19.S). Please, be sure to complete the
    Order Form IN FULL, legible, with your correct shipping address in order to
    prevent any processing delays in the shipment of your package. That's right,
    if you are really looking for a 100% LEGAL and LEGITIMATE home based income
    opportunity we can honestly say that you have finally found the right
    company with an honest and proven money making program!


    P.S. KNOW A FRIEND WHO MIGHT BE INTERESTED?
    PRINT A COPY FOR ALL YOUR FRIENDS AND FAMILY.
    NOTE: ALL ORDERS FROM FRIENDS AND FAMILY
    MUST BE ACCOMPANIED WITH THE PROCESSING FEE.
    FOR EACH FRIEND OR FAMILY ORDER, DEDUCT $10 FROM
    YOUR ORDER AS A BONUS. PRINT, COMPLETE AND MAIL
    IN THE ORDER FROM BELOW!




    Please mail in the order form only. Print below this line only!
    -----------------------------------------------------------------

    ................





    - HOMEWORKER ORDER FORM -

    * FORM AHG-743: 19.A (USE 2000-2001) *







    [Provide us with the correct mailing address to ship your starter's kit, and
    PLEASE PRINT CLEARLY]







    FIRSTNAME:_______________________LASTNAME:_______________________

    ADDRESS:___________________________________________APT.#:________

    CITY:_______________________________STATE:_________ZIPCODE__________

    DAY PHONE____)_______-_______ EVENING PHONE #____)______-_______

    BIRTHDATE:__/__/__ EMAIL ADDRESS___________________________

    SIGNATURE_________________________________TODAY'S DATE___/___/___


    YES, I would like the opportunity to earn extra money working right from the
    comfort of my home or apartment participating in the Pamphlet Processing
    Program. I understand that my starter's kit will contain the instructions
    necessary to get me started IMMEDIATELY as a member of the Pamphlet
    Processing Program! I also understand that my Starter's Kit will contain my
    very own copy of the CREDIT REPAIR MANUAL! I understand that I can use the
    CREDIT REPAIR MANUAL to legally clear up and repair any negative credit that
    I might have! I understand that this material is provided to me for becoming
    a member of the Pamphlet Processing Program! I also understand that I will
    be free to set my own hours and participate in the program either part-time
    or full-time. I do understand that a small refundable fee of $45 is a
    ONE-TIME FEE ONLY! I will not have to pay Central Sollutions any other
    fees, EVER! IMPORTANT: Since we DO NOT want to create any unnecessary
    competition between our existing members we do reserve the right to stop
    accepting new members if our quota is met. Therefore, if you are serious
    about this income opportunity we do suggest that you send in you completed
    form IMMEDIATELY that will GUARANTEE the delivery of your Starter's Kit!

    DESIRED WEEKLY INCOME 100 300 500 700 800 900 1000 1100 1200 1300 1400 1500
    (circle one)

    IMPORTANT: $50.00 ENCLOSED [$45 + $5 Postage and Handling]

    MONEY ORDERS AND CHECKS MUST BE PAYABLE TO:

    .................

    IMPORTANT: PLEASE ALLOW 2-4 WEEKS PROCESSING TIME FOR ORDERS PLACED WITH
    CHECKS. ORDERS PLACED BY MONEY ORDER OR CASH ALLOW 10 BUSINESS DAYS DELIVERY
    TIME.

    WHERE DID YOU SEE OUR COMPANY ADVERTISEMENT?

    NEWSPAPER____RECYCLER____MAIL____EMAIL____OTHER____









    This is a one time mailing. To be removed from our database, reply with "REMOVE" in the subject line.

    To ensure that the "unsubscribe process" has been completed successfully please allow 2 weeks. We do apologize for any
    interim emails that are received while we are updating our records.
    Again the usual "one time mailing" rubbish.

    The funniest thing? It is available to all US residents? I LIVE IN THE UK FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!!!
    Last edited by weirdbeardmt; Nov 14, 2001 at 19:33.
    I swear to drunk I'm not God.
    Matt's debating is not a crime
    Hint: Don't buy a stupid dwarf Clicky

  2. #2
    Sports Publisher mjames's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2000
    Location
    Charlotte, NC
    Posts
    5,891
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Yikes, that's pretty bad. I wanted to remind you that you should take out all company names and their contact info, as pathetic as they are...

  3. #3
    We like music. weirdbeardmt's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2001
    Location
    Channel Islands Girth: Footlong
    Posts
    5,882
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Originally posted by mjames
    Yikes, that's pretty bad. I wanted to remind you that you should take out all company names and their contact info, as pathetic as they are...
    0oops. Ok done.

    I just noticed two more things that made me laugh:

    1) In the bit where it says "Make checks payable to:" they actually managed to spell their company name wrong...

    2) And somewhere up there the way they have written it has made the forums bring it out as which I think is particularly apt!!
    I swear to drunk I'm not God.
    Matt's debating is not a crime
    Hint: Don't buy a stupid dwarf Clicky

  4. #4
    SitePoint Member malabar's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2001
    Posts
    24
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    hmm i've gotten this one before i think excite has the most trash though
    all about knives? what would i know about em? oh well.. whatever!
    I'm a certified Ninjai fanatic


Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •