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Whew, glad that's sorted. Sure didn't mean any offence! I live in a country where there's no such thing as a mixed-race couple. It's just a couple. We don't notice race.Originally Posted by brandaggio
Had these variables not been factors, perhaps I would have seen your humor better.
It's only a factor if you let it bother you.
I'm indian and I've had white girlfriends before and I've come to realise most of the dis-comfort is in your head.
Yes people stare... and you know what ??... they're simpletons and they always will. They have nothing better to do with their lives than roam around and peep at what other people are doing.
The bottom line is to remember that your focus in on the one you love and not be pre-occupied with what those idiots around you think. If you lose sight of this, I'm sorry but your relationship will not last very long, nor will it be as enjoyable as it should.
The reason I'm telling you this is because your reaction to HAWK's comment sort of gives away the fact that it bothers you... even if not overtly.
Your chick is very hot by the way... well done, dude.
In general, I feel physically attracted to white girls more than any other race, by far. It's just the way it is, I can't control it. But, contrary to the opinion of certain people I have shared this tidbit of information with, it doesn't mean I have anything against other races. It's just another variable in the field of things that make one person attracted to another. It doesn't mean I'll behave any differently around people of other races.
No Raffles, feeling attracted to someone of the opposite sex of a particular race is not racism, its the contrary.
Racism is, when you put someone down, or make others of a different race feel that his race is inferior than yours, intentionally or unintentionally (the french way), or verbally / physically abuse someone if he is looking different (may be the british, american or russian way).
Of course we can get attracted by girls of a particular race, that's more about attraction and compatibility and less about hatred. I think ...
Not always buddy. Life is often more cruel than that.
Actually, it was more that I didn't get the joke because the image was never broken for me...and I looked to explain/understand our miscommunication, in the absence of all the info.
I only am reminded of the fact that we aren't both Caucasian by other people - often it is the 1st generation immigrant Chinese (in Chinatown) that give me a hard time (if looks could kill). Most of the time, I grin broadly and enjoy my spoiler role - but sometimes it can be a burden.
As for attraction, I have had dready, golden, sun kissed hippie chick girlfriends and preppie ones going for advanced degrees - so I don't have a type (ethnic or otherwise) beyond needing to have that spark - it is all about someone who sets both brains on fire (the downstairs and upstairs brains
As for being overly defensive - the financial and sometimes personal demands of the rat race in NYC can sometimes be pretty daunting and overwhelming.
Can you tell I need a break
Last edited by brandaggio; Jun 30, 2007 at 10:22.
I know. Not always.
In some country's stuff like that can get you killed.
In some situations, family impressions can come into play. I've had to deal with that before too.
But I seriously think in most cases it's mental.
Yeah it's always the old people isn't it ??... hahaha
One of my best friends, who is quite dark skinned, sort of like Shaun's skin colour, went to another country last year and he said he's never experienced such racism in his life. It wasn't just one or two people in the street giving him nasty looks, it was most of them. He said it was a "What the hell are you doing here?" sort of look.
Yeah, Brandaggio, I agree about the two brains thing.
Last edited by HAWK; Jun 30, 2007 at 14:28.
Of course they do. It's innate human behaviour. If you're not physically attracted to someone then the relationship won't work on all levels. But I think the thing we sometimes forget is that people can become attractive to you if you get to know them. There have been people in my life that I've not looked twice at the first time I met them, but have ended up falling in love with once I got to know them.
I have found over the years that people who you get along with really well right of the bat (superficially) often become enemies in short thrift. Conversely, people with things in common can tend to bicker as they have a similar (but not identical) frame of reference - yet these folks that you initially were somewhat contentious with are far more likely (at least in my experience) to become real, long time friends.
Similarly, women I have really hit it off (I mean really, really hit it off with) with right of the bat - those are the shorter relationships I have had - when I have been ever so slightly less absorbed with just the pure physical aspect, and more in tune with intellectual attraction (the sort that lasts) I have had more longevity and better communication in my relationships.
Basically, if I jump in with my eyes (aka lower brain) and just my eyes, I know that my chances of having a long term, truly healthy relationship are essentially nil.
Doesn't mean you can't have some serious fun along the way, but I think it is important to be realistic about what can come of these situations - some good stories, maybe a trip to the doctor- but a quick bar pick up being a life partner? Pretty unlikely, if not impossible.
Off Topic:
congrates Hawk
Where is Lord Brar when you need him...
You're such a stereo-type, Ram... An indian who likes cricket... hahahahahaComplete corporate identity kit for $100 PM me for details
mycricketnetwork.com for the cricket fan in you
cricketalk.com forum for die hard cricket fans
cricketgreats.com revisit the heroes of the game
Thanks!Off Topic:
Hehehe. I hear ya.
Time to start a cricket thread perhaps boys?
My camera has gone on strike and is demanding additional benefits because of excessive overusage.So no luck. Heh.
Didn't take you long Lord!!
All you gotta do is think of me. Heh.
I didn't realise my thoughts were so powerful. I'd better reign them in a bit or all hell could break loose.
Then when a surgen comes along and gets your head, this is what head transplants do...
And baby wacko...
Strong Wacko...
...
It's been a while Nintendo... but I see that nothing much has changed.
well, so that's me ...
Electroskan... you're in love?
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