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Thread: Americans...

  1. #26
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    I've been around the world and found that only stupid people are breeding... the cretins cloning and feeding...

    -Harvey Danger's "Flagpole Sitta"
    That song got overplayed, but I love that line anway

    I also had a button when I was growing up (you know, in the 80s when buttons on your jean jacket was cool) that said:

    God must love stupid people- he made so many of them!
    But aren't we all stupid in one way or another?

    Except for Nicky, of course
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  2. #27
    Don't get too close, I bite! Nicky's Avatar
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    Hey, I'm reading this!

  3. #28
    SitePoint Enthusiast norfett's Avatar
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    Awwwwww, Nicky isnt stupid
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  4. #29
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    NONONO!!!

    Nicky is the exception, meaning she ISN'T stupid!
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  5. #30
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    I must apologise to any Americans who were hurt by this thread. Hopefully I can make it up to you by saying that your country is really beautiful? And rich? And...

    Okay, so I'm just going to s abig "SORRY" and hopefully the rest of the posters can regale us with tales of stupidity from ALL OVER the world...

    T

  6. #31
    will code HTML for food Michel V's Avatar
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    Originally posted by lucas


    never thought of that. can anyone from another country tell me where missouri is? missouri anyone? don't feel bad, most people in america don't know where it is either, hehe.
    In France we have a huge part of geography studies that focus on America, and yes, locating states is one of the things we learn.
    So Missouri, more since it's the place where my heart resides, is easy for me nno-american to locate
    [blogger: zengun] [blogware contributor: wordpress]

  7. #32
    Don't get too close, I bite! Nicky's Avatar
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    I know where NY is because I have been there!

  8. #33
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    As an American, I've tried to be as non-ignorant as possible (I've probably failed at that though ). I'm learning French in school, and I'm one of the few people who are actually taking a language...everyone thinks that English is the end-all be-all language and that everyone can speak it. Yes, it's the most popular language, but it only has a slight edge on Spanish and Chinese.

    I'd bet that over half of the people in the US don't know where Strasbourg is, yet we expect them to know where Chicago is. I was joking around with my friends about the US's ignorance when I figured out that they actually thought that France was the capital of Paris and that the Vatican was in Turkey. I guess they were just laughing along

    I wonder if there's some sort of quiz which will tell you if you're a typical ignorant American...it would be interesting (albeit illegal) to make it a requirement to pass that before you could vote in the US election.

  9. #34
    SitePoint Guru CJ's Avatar
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    Where there are stupid and smart people all over the world, it is no co-incidence that the average American has less knowledge than an average European or Japanese. It lies all within education. Everybody knows there is a big problem with the American education system. I can't really judge it, but 80% of the people I talk to online (let's not count in web developers because they are by general a bit more worldly) don't know where Belgium is. Mostly they say 'that's in Europe somewhere, right?'. You give me a country, I will tell you without looking in an Atlas where that country is, and maybe even give you some neighbouring countries. I admit I have trained a bit on thsi when I was little, but in 99% of all cases I will be right. (boast, boast)

    It's all in the education system.....

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    SitePoint Wizard silver trophy TheOriginalH's Avatar
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    I wonder if there's some sort of quiz which will tell you if you're a typical ignorant American...it would be interesting (albeit illegal) to make it a requirement to pass that before you could vote in the US electio
    Weeeell - Shouldn't the same test apply to presidential candidates? - Apply it to either and you wouldn't be in the current situation .

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    ********* Callithumpian silver trophy freakysid's Avatar
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    Why muck about? Eugenics is the go!

  12. #37
    Net Senior Citizen tommatthews's Avatar
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    When I moved from the USA to Australia, when I was a teenager, I continually got into arguments with Australians who insisted that the USA had only 48 states!

    Oh yea, and all Americans have a gun!

    Whenever I go back to the states for a visit I find that most Americans are quick to admit that they know nothing about Australia but are always keen to find out about it.

    In Australia our television is about 50% American dominated so people here tend to think the US is California!


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  13. #38
    Net Senior Citizen tommatthews's Avatar
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    While visiting England, George W. Bush is invited to tea with the Queen.
    He asks her what her leadership philosophy is. She says that it is to surround herself with intelligent people.
    Bush asks how she knows if they're intelligent. "I do so by asking them the right questions," says the Queen. "Allow me to demonstrate."
    She phones Tony Blair and says, "Mr. Prime Minister.
    Please answer this question: Your mother has a child, and your father has a child, and this child is not your brother or sister. Who is it?" Tony Blair responds,"It's me, ma'am." "Correct. Thank you and good bye, sir," says the Queen.
    She hangs up and says, "Did you get that, Mr. Bush?".
    "Yes, ma'am. Thanks a lot. I'll definitely be using that!"
    Upon returning to Washington, he decides he'd better
    put the Chairman of the Senate Foreign Relations Committee to the test. He summons Jesse Helms to the White House and says, "Senator Helms, I wonder if you can answer a question for me." "Why, of course, sir.
    What's on your mind?"
    "Uhh, your mother has a child, and your father has a child, and this child is not your brother or your sister. Who is it?"
    Helms hems and haws and finally asks, "Can I think about it and get back to you?" Bush agrees, and Helms leaves.
    Helms immediately calls a meeting of other senior
    Republican senators, and they puzzle over the question for several hours, but nobody can come up with an answer. Finally, in desperation, Helms calls Colin Powell at the State Department and explains his problem.
    "Now look here, son," Jesse says to Powell. Your mother has a child, and your father has a child, and this child is not your brother or your sister. Who is it?"
    Powell answers immediately, "It's me, of course, you dumb cracker."
    Much relieved, Helms rushes back to the White House
    and exclaims, "I know the answer, sir! I know who it is! It's Colin Powell!"
    And Bush replies in disgust, "Wrong, you dumb ****. It's Tony Blair!"


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  14. #39
    SitePoint Wizard silver trophy TheOriginalH's Avatar
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    hehe - that ones going to my mailing list

    H
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    SitePoint Wizard Goof's Avatar
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    Originally posted by Torias
    I must apologise to any Americans who were hurt by this thread. Hopefully I can make it up to you by saying that your country is really beautiful? And rich? And...

    Okay, so I'm just going to s abig "SORRY" and hopefully the rest of the posters can regale us with tales of stupidity from ALL OVER the world...

    T
    actaully I am hurt...so a large cash donation can be made to the following address:
    Nathan Rutman
    A slightly offbeat creative.

  16. #41
    SitePoint Wizard Goof's Avatar
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    Originally posted by qslack
    I'm learning French in school, and I'm one of the few people who are actually taking a language...everyone thinks that English is the end-all be-all language and that everyone can speak it. Yes, it's the most popular language, but it only has a slight edge on Spanish and Chinese.
    That's a good reason to take french I suppose
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  17. #42
    SitePoint Member tscratch's Avatar
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    I wonder if there's some sort of quiz which will tell you if you're a typical ignorant American...it would be interesting (albeit illegal) to make it a requirement to pass that before you could vote in the US election.
    If we were smart enough to pass this test we wouldn't be stupid enough to vote for the candidates running.
    --
    Eric

  18. #43
    SitePoint Enthusiast emcgill's Avatar
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    Actually, if we were smart enough to take that test, you florida people would have known how to use the ballot.

  19. #44
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    Personally I dont think a great knowledge of geography is important unless you are working on a project and or interacting with others in their country. Point blank if they arent making you money, Who cares where they are from and or how their soceity works. If you come to the USA and you tell me "I am from Sydney Australia". My response will be "So what, your here now". However if I take it upon myself to goto Australia the least I can do is familiarize myself with the major cities and general customs.
    Straight from the TP! And I don't mean the Trailer Park.

  20. #45
    SitePoint Addict SLeon's Avatar
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    I'm already familiar enough with Australia. It's a country the size of a continent and the shape of a kidney bean. It has two cities, Sydney and Melbourne, and the rest of the country is something called an "outback." This "outback" place must be pretty nice, because we have a restaurant chain here in the US called "Outback" and it's really good.

    Everyone in Australia talks in a strange accent, and they are always saying things like "g'day mate," which translated to Californian is "later, dude." They also say "cheers" a lot, which has no translation into any American idiom, although Canadians and Brits also seem to think that "cheers" is something to say when signing off a letter, rather than something to say when clinking glasses together.

    As to Australian culture, it's full of wacky people and potential Hollywood movie stars. I know this because I have seen movies about Australians like "Strictly Ballroom" and "The Castle." And people like Russell Crowe, Mel Gibson, Nicole Kidman, Gregory Rush, and Hugh Jackman come from Australia, but they always end up living in America, which must say something.

    Australians only drink one kind of beer, Foster's, and that's only because it comes in a really big can. Basically, they have no taste, even when compared with Americans, who everyone knows have no taste. Everything they eat is cooked on something called a "barbie." I'm not sure what an 11-inch plastic fashion doll has to do with cooking, but Australians apparently think it works.

    Australia only has one landmark, this big theater place located on a waterfront somewhere that looks like some kind of science-fiction helmet. It's very important for all movies about Australia to include a shot of this theater place so that the whole world knows that Australia has a little bit of culture. The only significant natural landmark in Australia is this thing called the "Great Barrier Reef," so called because it makes an impassable ring around the continent and is infested with man-eating sharks and poisonous jellyfish. Despite this, everyone in Australia loves to surf. It's probably a death-wish thing.

    Everyone in Australia has a kangaroo, a koala, a crocodile, and a dingo in their backyard.

    There are two colors of people in Australia: white people, who are all descended from the British, and black people, who are all Aboriginals who live in that place called "outback." Not only are the white people all of British descent, but their ancestors were all criminals who were sent there on big boats. This would explain the personality of some Australians seen here on SitePoint

    I did hear at some point that Australians consider the word "fanny" to have a radically different connotation than Americans do. Which makes a term like "fanny pack" wildly funny to them.

    There is a place called New Zealand which is somewhere near Australia, and no one is really sure whether New Zealand is a different country or not. They like sheep a lot in New Zealand.

    I think that about sums it up for Australia

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  21. #46
    SitePoint Wizard silver trophy TheOriginalH's Avatar
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    hehe - New Zealand is to Australia what Canada is to the USA. Everyone in the world without much knowledge of the area assumes one is part of the other, both have similar accents to their "big brothers", but drop any form of vowel to distinguish themselves, and you can be guaranteed to provoke violence with the simple phrase "you're from US/Oz aren't you?".

    PS: er....what DOES fanny mean in US?? *s******* - *schoolboy mode enabled*

    H

    Edit:

    Can't believe I can write "fanny", but not "sni gger"....
    Last edited by TheOriginalH; May 17, 2001 at 01:51.
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  22. #47
    SitePoint Addict SLeon's Avatar
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    In the US, "fanny" just means "bottom," as in "hindquarters." And a "fanny pack" is one of those little purses one wears around the waist. (They're supposed to hang down over the hindquarters, thus the name.)

    Oh, and I don't think that "sn igger" was the problem in your post. Without the "s" at the front, it's a very offensive term for an African-American person, here in the US. It looks like the "s" stayed, but the rest of the word got censored.
    Last edited by SLeon; May 17, 2001 at 06:23.
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  23. #48
    One website at a time mmj's Avatar
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    Sarah, which I appreciate the humour behind your post, I'll let you in on a little known fact.

    The Australian media likes to claim credit for many actors that were not even born in Australia, and have just spent a time of their life working here. Most people of Australia accept that the following are all Australian born actors and actresses:
    Mel Gibson, Russell Crowe, Guy Pearce, Hugo Weaving, Nicole Kidman.

    None of them are Australian born. 2 were born in USA, 1 in New Zealand, 1 in Nigeria, 1 in England.
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  24. #49
    Just Blow It bronze trophy
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    Originally posted by yajirobe

    It's Ar-kan-saw, not Ar-Kansas (even though that's how it is spelled).
    Reading this is funny, because I lived in Kansas for a while growing up (along with the other 11 places I lived before I turned 12), and they claim the Arkansas river is pronounced Ar-Kansas, not Ar-kan-saw like it is everywhere else in the country.
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    SitePoint Wizard creole's Avatar
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    Originally posted by emcgill
    Actually, if we were smart enough to take that test, you florida people would have known how to use the ballot.




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