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  1. #1
    Non-Member Andy Forsberg's Avatar
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    Student Suspended Over Suspected Use of PHP - HILARIOUS!

    Topeka, KS - High school sophomore Brett Tyson was suspended today after teachers learned he may be using PHP.

    "A teacher overheard him say that he was using PHP, and as part of our Zero-Tolerance policy against drug use, he was immediately suspended. No questions asked," said Principal Clyde Thurlow. "We're not quite sure what PHP is, but we suspect it may be a derivative of PCP, or maybe a new designer drug like GHB."

    php_logoParents are frightened by the discovery of this new menace in their children's school, and are demanding the school do something. "We heard that he found out about PHP at school on the internet. There may even be a PHP web ring operating on school grounds," said irate parent Carol Blessing. "School is supposed to be teaching our kids how to read and write. Not about dangerous drugs like PHP."

    In response to parental demands the school has reconfigured its internet WatchDog software to block access to all internet sites mentioning PHP. Officials say this should prevent any other students from falling prey like Brett Tyson did. They have also stepped up locker searches and brought in drug sniffing dogs.

    Interviews with students suggested that PHP use is wide spread around the school, but is particularly concentrated in the geeky nerd population. When contacted by BBspot.com, Brett Tyson said, "I don't know what the hell is going on dude, but this suspension gives me more time for fraggin'. Yee haw!"

    PHP is a hypertext preprocessor, which sounds very dangerous. It is believed that many users started by using Perl and moved on to the more powerful PHP. For more information on how to recognize if your child may be using PHP please visit http://www.php.net.
    By: Brian Briggs
    http://bbspot.com/News/2000/6/php_suspend.html

  2. #2
    ☆★☆★ silver trophy vgarcia's Avatar
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    Gee I haven't heard this one before

  3. #3
    Non-Member Andy Forsberg's Avatar
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    Sorry I'm not usually in the PHP discussion forum. Eat me.

  4. #4
    SitePoint Wizard mark_W's Avatar
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    LOL, someone posted this just the other day in the PHP forum!

  5. #5
    Non-Member demosfen's Avatar
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    This is not a legal advice ---------->
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    If Andy didn't post it here, I would never see it

  6. #6
    Huh? What now? tntcheats's Avatar
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  7. #7
    ********* Genius Mike's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by vgarcia
    Gee I haven't heard this one before

    Guess you didn't see this one either?
    Mike
    It's not who I am underneath, but what I do that defines me.

  8. #8
    Wanna-be Apple nut silver trophy M. Johansson's Avatar
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    But for the LOVE OF GOD, do a search before posting articles that are a million years old. Closing thread.
    Mattias Johansson
    Short, Swedish, Web Developer

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