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Thread: Moon poems

  1. #1
    Destiny Manager Plebius's Avatar
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    I'm writing a book of poems about the moon and I was hoping to get some feedback about some of them.

    solemn moon
    By moonlight I live
    In solemn melancholy
    In a world of crushed illusions
    Where all my hope is lost
    And all I have left is the moon
    To guide my way

    my dearest moonbeam
    You are my dearest moonbeam,
    my moonlight,
    my moonshine.

    You are the light that lights my way.
    You are the force that gives me strength.
    Now life, passion for life, flows through my veins.

    goodnight moon
    The moon so big and white,
    has something great in store.
    If not for me this moonlit night,
    what pain I must endure.

    Such a wicked trick the moon does play,
    and laughing all the while.
    I must endure this agony,
    for yet another mile.

    A certain times it does appear,
    to offer open hand.
    With arm outstretched it drops you down,
    to see how hard you land.

    What is this evil trick you play,
    to cause such misery.
    I'm through with you, o silly moon,
    you've had your fun with me!

  2. #2
    Skills to Pay the Bills Sparkie's Avatar
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    ..not sure if you're aware that "moonshine" is a type of thick alcoholic drink in the USA! Had to think twice when I read that

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    Serial Publisher silver trophy aspen's Avatar
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    I don't really like the first 2, I prefer longer poems. The third one is really good though.

    I'm also a poet, I've been published.. eh it was kinda lame but hey, its publication. The poem I had published has some to do with the stars, not the moon:


    The Wideness of the World
    The wideness of the world
    emptiness in all directions
    I look for the horizon that isn't there
    I look for the goal
    I look for the accomplishment
    I look for the end
    it isn't there
    unbounding vision
    obstructed sight
    I blink back my eyes
    I see not sight
    I see the barren land
    I see the starless sky
    but I see nothing
    and I wonder why
    I wish upon a shooting star
    a star I never saw
    the lies give me comfort
    my hope gives me lies
    I stare at the boundless sky
    to me its a wall
    I look at everyone
    and no one looks back
    and in their nonexistent stares
    I see my flaws
    I see my hurts
    and they are multiplied
    I see stars
    beyond my sky
    I see them shine
    and I wonder why


    The full body of my work is here:

    http://www.online-literature.com/poetry/

    Chris

  4. #4
    Destiny Manager Plebius's Avatar
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    Originally posted by Sparkie
    ..not sure if you're aware that "moonshine" is a type of thick alcoholic drink in the USA! Had to think twice when I read that
    Yeah, I know. kind of a double meaning there.

  5. #5
    Skills to Pay the Bills Sparkie's Avatar
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    okay LuZeR! I like your third poem best, personally..I've had some works published as well, but not online. I've recently entered a writing contest on writingtree.com, a very interesting online literature site. Wish me luck

    Thanks for sharing your work with us, LuZeR


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